AUTISMNEWSWIRE MOBILE autismnewswire mobile apps

Learning to Read is SNOW Much FUN with ClickN KIDS

Twitter / AutismNewsWire.com

↑ Grab this Headline Animator

21 things NOT to say to a child with autism- -and what to say instead

of 21 things NOT to say to a person with an autism spectrum disorder, compiled with the help of members of my facebook autism forum:

Loading

1. Shame on you.

*It depends on the circumstance. Let’s say your child bit his brother. Calmly say “no biting,” and separate him from his brother.

2. How many times do I have to tell you?

*No alternatives. Just don’t say it. Don’t you hate it when people say that to you?

3. Maybe (or maybe next time).

*”Yes” or “Not this time.” You’ll notice I didn’t use the word no. I like to reserve no for emergencies, like when a child is about to run into the street.

4. If you are good all week, I’ll give you blah blah blah.

*A whole week?? Even I can’t be good all week. Instead, give praise for little slices of time. If there is a chore your child needs to do each day, or a behavior that he needs to master, give them a star for a job well done. Once they collect a bunch of stars, they can pick out a toy from your secret toy stash. Mine had watercolor sets, small Lego sets and silly putty.

5. What is wrong with you?

*Grrr…Don’t you hate it when people say that to you? Instead, try “It seems like you are having a hard time. Is there something I can do to help?”

6. Focus.

*”Do you want to try this again, or do you need a break?”

7. It’s not loud to me.

*

We wouldn’t say that, would we?

8. I told you yesterday.

*Just don’t say it. Repeat what you need to tell your child calmly.

9. Wait just a minute. (Unless it’s truly just a minute)

*”I’m just finishing this phone call, and then I can help you.”

Then get off the phone and help him.

10. I promise. (Unless you are absolutely sure you can do what you are promising.)

11. It’s not a big deal that your Pokemon cards are out of order.

*Do you want me to help you put them back in order?

12. Look me in the eye.

*(We all know this is a no-no)

13. Stop obsessing.(It’s like saying “stop breathing” to a child with autism.)

*I know you like to talk about airplanes, and you sure know a lot about them. We are going to talk about something else for a while.

14. Idioms of any kind, such as “It’s raining cat’s and dogs.”

15. Shhh! You need to be quiet in here. (The guaranteed response to that is, “BUT I DON’T WANT TO BE QUIET!” at max volume.)

16. You need to wait.

*(see #9)

17. You’d better behave.

*See #4

18. Look at me when I am talking to you.

*(see # 11)

19. “Go ahead and ______ . See what happens.” (sarcasm, however slight, is bad. Autistic or not. )

20. It doesn’t matter, you still need to…

*”Do A, and then you can B”

21. Do you want a time out?

*Do want a break?